Texts From Last Night · alibeaz's Favorites

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alibeaz's Favorites Texts:

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(559): View more from California

Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.

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(719): View more from Colorado

I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.

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(540): View more from Virginia

I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.

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(614): View more from Ohio

i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.

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(315): View more from New York

I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.

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