i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Someone shattered a urinal.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize
