well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
