She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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