He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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