If you die in college, do you die in real life?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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