no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
