She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
