what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
