I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
And then he peed in my hair
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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