You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
