Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
last night I used snow as a chaser
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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