I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
