Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I wish you could order shots online.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
