she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
