i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize