Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
