I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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