So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
