I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
