her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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