i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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