If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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