I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Come see our sink grown plant.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
