I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
