A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
