You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
