when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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