We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize