Well douche your snatch and let's go!
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
