Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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