just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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