Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
