Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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