You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Boobs are out for the taking
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
