we're blogging at a bar
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
you win again, gameday.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
