we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
