Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
