Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
