I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
