Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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