He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
