it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
