i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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