So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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