Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
