After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
