well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
