I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
