Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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